I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize