spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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