Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
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When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
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When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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