You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize