he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
