My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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