i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
