Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
