is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
