WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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