Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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