I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Randomize
