Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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