i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
