sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Randomize
