I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize