What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
