the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Randomize
