We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
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