Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
