And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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