i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize