Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I am spending my child support on dildos
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
