so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
