on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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