Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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