gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
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But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
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At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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