What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
