i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
