Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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