is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
