S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
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