so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
