last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Randomize
