I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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