i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
