I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize