I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Randomize
