he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
