We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
