Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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