Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize
