She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Randomize
