Can i not drive my cunt home
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize