found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Panties = found
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
