she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
