College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
