Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
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