im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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