i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
