Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Randomize
